


no crying until the end

by orphan_account



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Cancer, Car Accidents, Child Death, Drowning, Gen, Hate Crimes, Homophobia, Reapers, Swearing, if you think anything else needs tagging, just tell me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-17 10:10:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5865205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Today, Mastuoka Rin has five names in his list.</p><p>Five, innocent names that have to be torn from their world.</p><p>God, how he hates his job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Midnight

Matsuoka Rin hated his job.

Now, he knew that a common sentiment shared amongst most people of the world, but their complaints about their work would always, without doubt, pale in comparison to Rin's.

This was because Rin was a reaper. Not the Grim Reaper, no, as that wasn't real, but he was a reaper nonetheless. There was more than one reaper, though he didn't even know more than a handful of others. He didn't know what controlled them, or what decided who lived and who died, but he did know one thing -

"Fuck this shit!" he yelled, throwing - well, he wasn't quite sure what it was - something across the void that reapers lived in. His friend, a tall, dark reaper with teal eyes that went by the name of Sousuke, raised his eyes.

"What is it?" he asked, his voice deep and comforting to Rin. But his rage still burned as he turned around and shoved his wrist in Sousuke's face. There was his list for the day, tattooed neatly on his wrist. Only five names, Sousuke noticed, but then he took a closer look.

**1\. Hazuki Nagisa - 21 years old, medical school student - 2:14 AM, murder due to hate crime.  
** **2\. Tachibana Makoto - 31 years old, teacher and father of two - 7:48 AM, trauma due to car accident.**  
**3\. Nitori Aiichirou - 16 years old, high school student - 11:08 AM, complications during heart surgery.**  
**4\. Ryuugazaki Rei - 37 years old, medical oncologist - 13:54 PM, broken neck after falling down stairs.**  
**5\. Nanase Haruka - 6 years old, elementary school student - 4:32, drowned in swimming pool.**

"Fuck this shit," Rin growled, yanking away his wrist from Sousuke. "Look at that! Two kids, a dad, and two people who look after other people! What kind of sick fuck gives a reaper of list of nothing but innocent people?!"

"No one gives us the list," Sousuke said. "We just get it."

"I know - I know we do," Rin sniffed, pressing his arm against his eyes. He couldn't cry. He wouldn't. "But - for fuck's sake - is it so hard to give us one fucking jerk?"

He could feel Sousuke watching him as he tried hard not to break down. It wasn't fair. Even on days when he had more than one kid to take, there was always at least one person who he could enjoy taking away. It was wrong, and he shouldn't, but in this job - in this stupid, stupid job - you took what little enjoyment you could.

At times, Rin wished he went to afterlife instead of staying and becoming a reaper. It would have been so much easier, living with other souls in harmony, instead of having to take people there. He wished that he could change the fate he had - not dying young, oh no, he had forgotten about that now - but choosing this. This, he thought bitterly as he stood up, should not be a reward. This should be a punishment.

"I'm out," he muttered, opening up a portal that lead to somewhere near his first person for the night.

"Rin," Sousuke called out. "Just remember -"

Rin gritted his teeth, and stepped through the portal. There was a white, blinding light, but he could still hear Sousuke's words.

_"No crying until the end."_


	2. Hazuki Nagisa - 02:14 AM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first is always the hardest of the day.

From the small amount of time Rin had spent around Hazuki Nagisa, he could surmise one thing; he was very, very gay. And normally, Rin would be okay with that. In fact, he would encouraging it, for if Rin's own death taught him anything, it was fuck what everyone else thought and be yourself.

Hazuki Nagisa wasn't just gay though; he was small and lithe, and so full of energy Rin wondered if he had taken - coke? Speed? Whatever people took nowadays. It was a lot more simpler when you only had opium. Though Nagisa seemed to be one of the few people who were genuinely hyper all of the time, because he twirled and leapt around the dance floor as though it was his home.

Home.

Rin - though he knew reaping Nagisa would instantly become worse - wondered about Nagisa's home. Was he someone's precious son? A beloved brother, older or younger? Or was he isolated or estranged from them? if so, would they scoff at his death or regret their actions? Nagisa didn't seem to have a weight like that on his shoulders - not by the way he flirted with people so easily, nor by the way he seemed to effortlessly charm most of them. Men and women alike seemed to fall under his charms, but Rin kept a watch on them, because maybe - just maybe - he could see who was going to kill Nagisa, and prevent that.

(He was ignoring history that went wrong.)

It was 1:50 AM when Nagisa left the club - though that was mainly because he had tried to flirt with the bartender as he cleaned up. He was shivering, though that was probably because he was dressed for clubbing - tiny pink shorts and a striped crop top - and not for walking home during a cold night. The areas he walked in weren't the most friendly, nor were they close to any university Rin knew about Maybe he lived off campus?

"Excuse me?" Nagisa's voice jolted the reaper from his pondering. Nagisa seemed to have been stopped by a gang, the leader towering above him. "I'm - I'm trying to get home here. Can you move, please?"

"Oh, we could," the leader said, taking a step towards Nagisa. He was too tall, in Rin's opinion, with dark green hair swept backwards. "But I don't think we will."

Nagisa took a step back. "I'm going home though," he repeated, wrapping his arms around his exposed stomach. "So maybe we could pick this up in the morning?"

"We've seen you around," the leader continued. "You're a whore, you know that? Always hanging off guys, trying to get their cocks up your ass -"

"I don't see what this has to do with anything," Nagisa repeated, taking another step back only to be stopped by a gang member. "Please, just let me go home -"

"What, you're that much of a pussy you can't defend yourself?" the leader asked. "Not even a little bit? Man, you really are -"

Nagisa had punched the leader in the stomach, and Rin - despite knowing what would happen - smiled, and cheered Nagisa on.

The gang leader reeled back for a moment, and then his face turned sour. "You fucking faggot!" he roared, and the man stood behind Nagisa lunged for him, pushing the small boy to the street.

Nagisa's head hit the pavement with a crack, his face receiving the brunt of the blow. A scarlet river flowed from his nose when he lifted his head, and he tried to push himself back up. For whatever reason, the gang allowed him up, with a few members laughing to themselves as Nagisa swayed back and forth in a desperate attempt to avoid falling. The leader stepped foward, and Rin only watched in horror as his fist connected with Nagisa's head, causing the blond to fall to the ground once again. This time, he didn't get up; did he know it was better to stay down, to try and protect yourself? Or was he just too scared to stand?

"You fucking stupid asshole!" the leader yelled again, kicking Nagisa in the head so hard it jolted backwards, and Rin was half afraid it would break off entirely. Curl up into a ball, he found himself urging Nagisa. Diminish yourself, protect your head, give them something less to attack!

But Nagisa stayed still as the gang fell upon him. They fought for any flesh they could get their hands on in order to bruise or cut or wound Nagisa, to draw some kind of blood or life from him.

Rin turned his head away, but the sounds still reached his ears and he felt his stomach churn. Nagisa wasn't even begging his attackers to stop - he just let out weak moans of pain as another foot hit him.

At 02:13 AM, Rin reached out and felt amongst torrid crimson and fierce emerald to find a small, quavering, pink soul.

At 2:14 AM, he pulled the soul from its body. Hazuki Nagisa was dead.

"Uozumi!" one of the gang members yelled. "The faggot's not breathing!"

Rin ignored him, and watched as the soul in front of him formed into Nagisa.

"Then leave him alone!" the leader - Uozumi it seemed - said, though he still aimed a final kick at Nagisa head. "Don't want police after us!" They vanished after that, and Rin was left with Nagisa.

If Rin had to compare a new-born soul to anything, it would be a fawn. They both had trouble staying upright for a time, and both had scared, confused eyes. Nagisa was now staring Rin down, a shaky smile stretched across his face.

"Hello!" he chirped. "Who are you? I'm -"

"Hazuki Nagisa. I know," Rin interrupted, in his best formal voice with minimal shaking. Denial hurts more in the end. "I'm Matsuoka Rin, and I will be your guide to the afterlife." He bowed, and didn't dare look up.

"After - oh. Oh," Nagisa said, and then he hummed for a bit. "Yeah I thought I might not survive that. Where am I?"

Rin straightened up. "In the world between worlds," he said. "Most souls only see it once. Some see it all the time. You belong to the former. Come with me." He tried hard to sound brisk - the more Nagisa stayed, the more chance he would see his body and want to stay.

"Aww, can't I stay?" Nagisa whined, pouting a bit. "This place seems interesting!"

"It really isn't," Rin admitted, holding out his hand. "Come on, Hazuki Nagisa. I'm sure someone is waiting for you."

That was a cheap tactic, he told himself. Truth was, there might be nobody waiting for Nagisa, or they could have faded into the ether and been reborn by now.

"Aunt Gou?" Nagisa asked, and his eyes brightened. "Is she really?"

"Yes," Rin said, gritting his teeth. "She is. Shall we be going?"

Nagisa nodded, and Rin started to mutter the required incantations for the door to appear. First, there was a tiny pinprick of white light in between him and Nagisa, and then it grew, until it formed a door precisely Nagisa's height. It shone as Rin finished the incantation, and then there was silence.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Besides that? Sure."

"Will I be remembered?" Nagisa asked.

"What?"

"Remembered. Will I be remembered? Will my death mean anything?"

Oh. Rin was expecting a different question from Nagisa. Something about what the afterlife was like, or if it would hurt. Not that. 

"I don't know," Rin admitted. It felt as though he had a stone in his throat. "Did people care for you?"

Nagisa shrugged. "I suppose. My parents were always yelling at me, but don't all of them?"

"Then yes. You will be remembered." Rin gestured to the door. "Goodbye, Hazuki Nagisa. I hope it was a good life."

"Bye Reaper-chan," Nagisa said, and he stepped into the door. For a brief moment, and aurora seemed to shoot out, and Rin covered his eyes, but then it ceased, and Rin was left alone on a dark, Tokyo street.

One down, four to go, he told himself.

He won't cry just yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm… not happy with this. I feel the ending is rushed and phoned in, but it was the best I could do. Poor Nagisa though. Poor, poor Nagisa. But Makoto is up next, and, well…  
> Be prepared.
> 
> Feedback, critiques, and comments are welcomed.

**Author's Note:**

> One chapter per character, that's how it's going to go.
> 
> Sorry for the short intro, but the others will be longer, I promise.
> 
> Based off a prompt from Mr. Enter's list of 42 writing prompts, with minor alterations on my part.


End file.
